Monday, December 18, 2006

Have you ever heard of someone this wimpy before?

Hi Carlos,

My friends read your blog and even signed up for your newsletter

Your response has sparked a good discussion on the subject between my friends and I. It has been a month and a half now that my one friend who's a co-worker talks about his 'flame' every day for an estimated average of 30 min. More and more I find myself commenting that whatever he brings up doesn't matter, that it's details of casual communication and staying in touch that he spends far too much time thinking about.

Interestingly, from his descriptions, he consistently displays alpha behavior when WITH the girl. It's when they are separated that he gets into wussy mode towards his entourage and unfortunately also towards her on the phone and particularly by e-mail.

In one e-mail, he completely spilled out his guts to her about how frustrated he was with not being able to move forward with her as he'd like to and how he had already felt rejected in two occasions where he wanted to kiss her. How it was perfectly ok if she needed time to get over her ex, but uh, uh, uh, the rest of the email screaming the opposite: hold me, caress me, promise me that we will still be going out in 2007 - OMG!

Speaking of that, could you write something that clarifies how it's not always the best choice to communicate every feeling we have, especially negative feelings or wussy feelings, when we have them? Especially while there simply isn't a couple yet... The media and women complaining about men not communicating their feelings enough could lead some guys in the wrong direction.


I hate to say this, but your friend is a complete wimp.

Of COURSE from his descriptions he's an Alpha. He's embarrassed that he's such a wimp that he'll tell you any story. Hell, he knows that if he were to say it out loud, even HE would recognize what a pussy he is. That's why he probably invents stories about how he "put her in her place," yadda yadda.

Your friend is also in complete denial.

Your strategy should be this:

1) Sit him down and have an intervention. This is where all of you confront him on his behavior in the hopes that by showing solidarity and support, and brotherly concern, you can wake him up from his sniveling existence before his ovaries pop.

2) Pry his wallet out of his purse (it's probably in the pocket next to his tampons and his birth control pills) and find the credit card that is NOT maxxed out due to him buying roses for her.

3) Go to my site and get him The Secrets of the Alpha Man.

4) Refuse to talk about his wimpy little relationship or her anymore. He's looking for more guys he can administer lethal injections of estrogen into.

Oh, and here's something else that will show him the power of this material.

5) Use a big black marker and write down "Your girlfriend will break up with you in the near future, telling you that she 'isn't sure where this is going' or that she 'needs some time apart.' She's probably even going to cheat on you."

Give this note to the bartender of the pub you frequent the most.

When this prophecy comes true, have the bartender pull the envelope out and read the note to him. Everybody chant "We told you so!" three times. Then ask your friend if he's ready to come back to reality.

I have never been more certain of anything in the last few days than what I see emerging in his pattern. She WILL dump him, guaranteed. (Unless he's rich, in which case, she will probably marry him and find herself a pool boy to live out her sexual fantasies with. And that's no indictment of women - I wouldn't blame her for it!)

As for the last part you said about it not being a good idea to communicate every feeling, yes, you hit it right on the head.

The guys that go around spilling their guts are doing that because they lack self-control, and they don't know how to manage their own emotions. They don't understand them, so they think that disclosure is a good idea. (Maybe they think it's therapeutic in some way.)

It's not.

It's needy, whiney, clingy, she-male behavior. Women look at this kind of behavior with disdain and contempt.

Men have feelings but we don't cry about them on every shoulder. We're MEN, dammit!

Grow a pair and learn how to be an Alpha Man. Before this happens to you.

alpha man | how to talk to women | approach women | dating advice for men


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