Are you still living at home?
I have a quick question. By me telling women I'm a 24 year old male still staying at home with my mother stop the action? It seems like everytime I tell a woman I still stay at home with my mother at 24 years old they either stop trying to kick it with me, or make an excuse as to why they can't hang out. Even when my mother isn't there.
I was talking to a friend who said no woman is going to want to fuck or lay up under me in my mother's house.
Any advice?
______________________
CARLOS XUMA'S ADVICE:
Well, let's figure this out...
First of all, whenever you're in a situation that can be viewed as a negative, it's your job - your DUTY - to make it a positive. Life hands you lemons, you make lemonade. Not in some kind of dumb, deny-the truth kind of way, either. You simply take life by the lemons and SQUEEEEEEZE until you get the lemonade.
Hmmm... that's not really an appetizing metaphor, but you get what I mean.
Lately there's been that video of the "Secret" being passed around, and it's become something of a phenomenon. Now the essential message of "The Secret" has been around for thousands of years. I learned it back when I was about 22. I was a self-development junkie, and I got the Earl Nightingale recording of "The Strangest Secret." (He had a "gold" record for this WAY back when, and he was the first person to really popularize the concept.)
The message is: You become what you think about.
BUT - most people are being misled by the video, thinking that if they just think about things, they'll appear.
Uh, no. Not quite.
You have to add one more element that they don't tell you about:
WORK.
That's right, friends and neighbors. There is no gain without some sweat equity.
If you're not working on what it is you want, it will NOT just come to you, no matter how promising that concept is presented in the video and the book. They make it seem like you just start programming your subconscious mind and that's it. Just sit back and wait.
In some cases, whatever it is you desire will take back-breaking, blood - sweat & tears effort to acquire.
About 10 years ago, I wrote down about 10 long-term goals for my life on an index card. I pulled that card out about a year ago to find that I'd completed 9 out of the 10 goals.
One of them was to obtain a black belt. Do you think I could have just settled for daydreaming about getting my black belt?
No.
I had to get off my ass and go into a dojo at least a couple times a week. I had to take private lessons to improve my ability. Then I had to practice it for years to ingrain the moves into my muscle memory. Now I can learn a Shaolin Chinese kung-fu form in a matter of a few hours, like I just did this morning. It's called "Buddha Fist" and it's sweet. But that ability came AFTER I put in the effort. Not before.
My black belt didn't just fall into my lap. I busted ASS to get it.
But I did get it.
Now, I digress. You're wondering, what the hell does this have to do with living with your parents...
If you're in a situation that is not what you desire, TOUGH. You better get behind your situation and appear all right about it or your friend is right, a woman won't want to be with you.
Now, you didn't say why you were still at home, so I'm assuming there's really no good reason for it. So guess what? It's time to get working on the solution. Here it is:
FIRST: Move out. ASAP.
Why are you still living at home? Laziness? Gambling debts? Taking care of mom?
Well, whatever it may be you better figure it out and make that reason ready for prime time.
Let's say you're just not where you planned to be in your career right now. (And if this career is in the food service industry, it's time for you to get ambitious.)
If you can't leave home, if it's out of necessity, than get clear on it so that you don't constantly undermine your own confidence. If YOU aren't sure about why you're in the situation you're in, or at least working on changing it, a woman will not dig you and you aren't going to get far with her. She WILL smoke you out. Women evolved this ability over thousands of millennia.
No, not even with clever hypnotic weasel phrases or routines. These work for guys who have the courage and confidence to project their personalities.
But if you're okay with the reason, and you put it out there, you're likely to get a whole lot further.
You see the one thing a woman is attracted to more than anything is AMBITIOUS POTENTIAL. She's only got to sense your potential and your desire to strive to know she's with an Alpha Man.
If you're looking for me to provide a short-cut for you so you can trick some unwitting woman into sex with you when you have nothing good to offer back, well think again.
If you don't have the skills, you don't deserve the rewards.
If you don't work for it, you don't deserve to HAVE it.
Dead simple, see.
You see, this is where I differ from some of the "gurus" out there telling you that if you use this or that clever technique, you can trick yourself past her radar to sleep with her.
Nope. Sorry. You'll just join the thousands of disappointed "pickup artists" who find that there is a dead-end to this cult of thinking.
If you want to know better how to project your ambition - and even create a mission and a purpose for yourself in life, go look at the REAL Secret...
I was talking to a friend who said no woman is going to want to fuck or lay up under me in my mother's house.
Any advice?
______________________
CARLOS XUMA'S ADVICE:
Well, let's figure this out...
First of all, whenever you're in a situation that can be viewed as a negative, it's your job - your DUTY - to make it a positive. Life hands you lemons, you make lemonade. Not in some kind of dumb, deny-the truth kind of way, either. You simply take life by the lemons and SQUEEEEEEZE until you get the lemonade.
Hmmm... that's not really an appetizing metaphor, but you get what I mean.
Lately there's been that video of the "Secret" being passed around, and it's become something of a phenomenon. Now the essential message of "The Secret" has been around for thousands of years. I learned it back when I was about 22. I was a self-development junkie, and I got the Earl Nightingale recording of "The Strangest Secret." (He had a "gold" record for this WAY back when, and he was the first person to really popularize the concept.)
The message is: You become what you think about.
BUT - most people are being misled by the video, thinking that if they just think about things, they'll appear.
Uh, no. Not quite.
You have to add one more element that they don't tell you about:
WORK.
That's right, friends and neighbors. There is no gain without some sweat equity.
If you're not working on what it is you want, it will NOT just come to you, no matter how promising that concept is presented in the video and the book. They make it seem like you just start programming your subconscious mind and that's it. Just sit back and wait.
In some cases, whatever it is you desire will take back-breaking, blood - sweat & tears effort to acquire.
About 10 years ago, I wrote down about 10 long-term goals for my life on an index card. I pulled that card out about a year ago to find that I'd completed 9 out of the 10 goals.
One of them was to obtain a black belt. Do you think I could have just settled for daydreaming about getting my black belt?
No.
I had to get off my ass and go into a dojo at least a couple times a week. I had to take private lessons to improve my ability. Then I had to practice it for years to ingrain the moves into my muscle memory. Now I can learn a Shaolin Chinese kung-fu form in a matter of a few hours, like I just did this morning. It's called "Buddha Fist" and it's sweet. But that ability came AFTER I put in the effort. Not before.
My black belt didn't just fall into my lap. I busted ASS to get it.
But I did get it.
Now, I digress. You're wondering, what the hell does this have to do with living with your parents...
If you're in a situation that is not what you desire, TOUGH. You better get behind your situation and appear all right about it or your friend is right, a woman won't want to be with you.
Now, you didn't say why you were still at home, so I'm assuming there's really no good reason for it. So guess what? It's time to get working on the solution. Here it is:
FIRST: Move out. ASAP.
Why are you still living at home? Laziness? Gambling debts? Taking care of mom?
Well, whatever it may be you better figure it out and make that reason ready for prime time.
Let's say you're just not where you planned to be in your career right now. (And if this career is in the food service industry, it's time for you to get ambitious.)
If you can't leave home, if it's out of necessity, than get clear on it so that you don't constantly undermine your own confidence. If YOU aren't sure about why you're in the situation you're in, or at least working on changing it, a woman will not dig you and you aren't going to get far with her. She WILL smoke you out. Women evolved this ability over thousands of millennia.
No, not even with clever hypnotic weasel phrases or routines. These work for guys who have the courage and confidence to project their personalities.
But if you're okay with the reason, and you put it out there, you're likely to get a whole lot further.
You see the one thing a woman is attracted to more than anything is AMBITIOUS POTENTIAL. She's only got to sense your potential and your desire to strive to know she's with an Alpha Man.
If you're looking for me to provide a short-cut for you so you can trick some unwitting woman into sex with you when you have nothing good to offer back, well think again.
If you don't have the skills, you don't deserve the rewards.
If you don't work for it, you don't deserve to HAVE it.
Dead simple, see.
You see, this is where I differ from some of the "gurus" out there telling you that if you use this or that clever technique, you can trick yourself past her radar to sleep with her.
Nope. Sorry. You'll just join the thousands of disappointed "pickup artists" who find that there is a dead-end to this cult of thinking.
If you want to know better how to project your ambition - and even create a mission and a purpose for yourself in life, go look at the REAL Secret...
alpha man | how to talk to women | approach women | dating advice for men
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